HOW DID I END UP HERE?
It's a question that I ask myself sometimes, when I look back at what I did for a living and the other choices I made during most of my adult life (for the record, I was involved in some sort of "helping field" from the age of 14 to 35), I sometimes look at the pile of purchase orders, invoices and job orders surrounding me and ask: how did I end up here?
I always said I would someday write a book about my experiences working in psych hospitals and treatment centers to chronicle my experiences and expose the kind of craziness reserved for mental health workers to the world at large.
I have attempted this several times, most recently with full metal jackass-my other blog, which is woefully deprived of my attention. I never finished a project on this matter.
Why? I have experienced some amazing things over the years. Equal parts joy, sadness,frustration and fear. I have touched the lives of countless people and they have had an impact on me in ways that are foreign to everyday life...I should have alot to say, but somehow,when I try to say it I am at a loss for words.
I have stories that would curl your hair,make you smile, cry, cringe and shake your head in disbelief. But they won't come out. I wish they would.
I guess they are lessons meant to stay inside, to give me perspective on life only.
Not to be shared with the rest of the world.
Or maybe I'm just full of shit.
So, how did I end up being the parts manager at a pool company?
The 21 year trajectory goes something like this:
Volunteer- Therapist technicianI,II and III- Mental health worker- Unit coordinator- Center supervisor/Crisis intervention team- milieu coordinator- Unit manager- retired- Juvenile corrections officer (this one was fun...not)-Emergency shelter house manager- retired- Pool cleaner/mechanic- Quality assurance manager- unemployed- House manager for community based home for multihandicapped persons (tards in wheelchairs wearing diapers)- Parts manager.
How did this happen? Don't misunderstand me...I like my job, alot, even though it drives me crazy sometimes.
I was gonna save the world, humanity at one point, and now I just help people figure out what size heater they need for their hot tub.
Putting it all in perspective, maybe that's enough to aspire to. Leave the windmill killing to the young.