TORN




As I mentioned yesterday,my son and his family are moving to Colorado in January.It's an employment opportunity at the root for Brandy,and they would be foolish to pass on it.Kyle and I discussed it when we were visiting last week and,at that point they weren't going.Family and friends are all here etc etc...yada yada.I got a feeling then that more discussion would ensue between them and they would decide to go for it,so when Kyle called and told me the other day I was not surprised.
He lined it out for me and the bottom line is it's an opportunity to have a better life than they have now,for them and their children.I was impressed at the level of thought that went into the decision.
He also told me that he's been in love with Colorado since I took him there when he was 12*.This I can also understand...I moved there the first time in 1979,and again in 1982.It's an amazing place compared to here,the landscape,the seasons,the possibilities.I could of stayed there,but I ended up back here and my life has played out the way it has since.Had I not come back,there would be no Kyle,no Ann,and no extended family like the one I have now.I have no regrets about the choices I made,maybe a few lingering "what ifs" but the bottom line is I made some life long friends while I was there and I made my life here.
What got to me,and ultimately brought me back to Texas was home sickness.After my first wife and I split and I was truly on my own up there,I was lonely.I had my friends and all but something was missing,I missed my family.It was like a hole in me,always there no matter what other good things were happening.So I came home,and for awhile,it was all good.But being back in Texas wore on me,I missed the mountains and the cold and the snow and my friends.
I was torn.So I went back,but that didn't work out so well for me and here I am, all these years later...in Texas.
I hope Kyle considers the power of home sickness...it's powerful medicine.His circumstances are very different from mine, he has a family,they have an opportunity awaiting them.But the home sickness will be the same,the difference being they have each other.
So I say go for it,and the best of luck.It sounds like a great adventure is awaiting them.
I just can't shake the feeling that,no matter the outcome,to his mother it will somehow be my fault* that they left.
But that's another story...
I will miss them very much...I already do.