THIS CORNER IS CLOSED

The northwest corner of our yard is now closed, blocked by a variety of large bulky objects... a cabinet, a large tank, some chicken wire...Whatever it takes to keep the dogs from getting into that corner. The adjacent yard is home to Oliver, some border collie mix who delights in inciting our posse into a frenzy of barking and leaping and other canine mayhem that sounds like they are killing something. Irene can get between the deck and the fence for some real up close and personal snarling and teeth gnashing. It's really fucking annoying.
Tonight I cut them off, cold turkey. To watch them marvel at my barrier making skills was joyful. "Whatcha gonna bark at now, Bizzel's?" I said in my best Cypress Hill/Dave Chappell black/white guy intonation. They could not penetrate the blockade... Success.
I was sick of screaming "HEY!!!" and "Get in here you fucking mother fucking fucks !!!!"Besides, making the fart sound loud enough for Theo to hear over the dogs of war soundtrack is tiring to the lips and wholly undignified.
They were bummed. So was Oliver.
But now that the corner is closed our back yard has been a much quieter place.
And everyone is happy about that.