Saturday, June 07, 2008

A week + of ...
So last Wednesday, no wait, not this week's Wednesday but the week before, I had a really great day. Then Thursday rolled around and I fell into a funk that lasted until today. I don't know if it was hormones, the 100 degree weather, the usual crap at work, my dad's kidney cancer, or some anniversary of an event that I no longer consciously remember. But I haven't felt like blogging or doing much of anything beyond being grumpy. I could probably even blame it on allergies since those have been acting up, but I have a feeling that something was rattling around in the back of my head and well, whatever it was, it's finally cleared up. Cleared up enough that I could laugh at a conversation I had with the floor manager today at work. He asked me if I would do ticket auditing, but I didn't have to, he was just asking. You see, he thought I hated doing it and I replied, truthfully, that I didn't mind auditing so much ,but people think I do because I complain about the broken parts of the process. Anyway, this was amusing because people think I hate doing something that I actually don't mind doing and also because of the "if you don't wanna do it, you don't have to" aspect of it as if I would actually say "no" to doing something my employer asked me to do that didn't violate my ethics (and ticket auditing definitely doesn't qualify as a violation of ethics.) I realized that who I am and who these people think I am are two very different things and for some reason I found that to be very funny because, of course, I am just me and yet there are all these different versions of me floating around in other people's heads. And then I thought what if all these other versions of me actually existed and were running around doing things other than what I do like saying "fuck you, no, I don't want to do ticket audits." Well, maybe you had to be there in my head to get the laugh, but it really was amusing to me.

So the funk has passed and I spend a lovely evening on the front porch talking with Rob and my best friend LT. Whatever was bugging me is gone, good riddance, and life feels good again.

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