THE DIVERSITY TRAINER (DAY ONE)

Back in the day I used to teach something called PMAB or Preventive Management of Aggressive Behavior. I taught it a lot,I was good at it. I taught newbie mental health workers how to manage crisis situations verbally and if that didn't work,how to kick some psychiatric ass.
I was certified by Cornell university to do this.
Taking my experience into account and considering the new door the firing of Imus has opened I have been developing a diversity training program geared towards the likes of Imus and the others like him.
I presented my seminar to a test group including Imus,Stern,O'Reilly,Savage,among other "shock jocks" in need of some "re-education".
Here's my outline of my presentation.

8am: Registration and distribution of workshop materials including a miniature confederate flag,a white hood,and a 16 oz. bottle of pure distilled hate.Coffee and donuts provided.The coffee is black and the donuts are chocolate.Let the indoctrination begin.
8:30am: Pick a table of hate. Participants choose a group table based on what they hate...each table seats 8. The nigger table fills up first,followed closely by the jew table, then the arab table followed closely by the wetback table (with it's distinctive sombrero motif) and finally the Irish table is partially filled by a conglomerate of nigger,arab,jew,wetback haters that overslept and missed the 8am registration.
They don't hate the Irish, but hey, it's close to the snack line.And they will hate anyone for a fresh danish.
9am:Introduction and mission statement.
"Hello and welcome to Diversity NOW 2007! I'm your instructor Th' Rev. I'm a certified instructor in all things diverse.How are ya'll doin'?!?!OK...Let's get to it,repeat after me:
Me:"All niggers are lazy"!
Group:"All niggers are lazy".
Me:"I can't hear you"!
Group:"ALL NIGGERS ARE LAZY"!
Me:"Thats more like like it...NOW!All mexicans are thieves"!
Group:"All mexicans are thieves".
Me:"What??? I CAN'T HEAR YOU"!!!
Group:"ALL MEXICANS ARE THIEVES"!
Me:"Thats right"!Now,what happens when niggers and mexicans interbreed"?"Limbaugh,what do you think"?
Limbaugh: "A race too lazy to steal"?
Me:"Exactamundo! You rancid pile of shit"!If mexicans and niggers interbred they would produce a generation of caramel colored abusers of the system and society".
Limbaugh:" I knew I was in tune...I knew it"!
Me:OK...Now group,repeat after me, "Jews control hollywood with the syphlitic grip of Al Capone".
Group:"Jews control hollywood with the syphlitic grip of Al Capone"!
Me:"OOOOHHHH...this group is really in touch with the jew threat to our country, but it's time for a commercial break from our friends at Nathans kosher hotdogs,made by jews,not out of them, like in 1930's germany...we'll be right back".
Stay tuned for more...