GRUDGES

Everybody's got one,some of us have more than one.There are even people who are so tangled up in holding on to the past that they can't move forward,because they have too many grudges in the fucking way.
Then there are those few that have a grudge against the world...the WORLD.Those are the ones with the really stooped shoulders-you've seen them and talked to them.Talking to people like that makes me want a nap,tiresome.
But we all have grudges,except for the people who don't and they are called Mr.Rogers.
I remember when I was 18 and working at the state school and I heard this description of an older co worker by another co worker:"She would complain about taking a good shit".Now that,my friends,is someone with a major grudge.Let's look at the definition of a grudge...

Grudge:n. A deep-seated feeling of resentment or rancor...

There are two kinds of grudges for me,I categorize them in the french parlance of descriptions of epileptic seizures-Gran mal (big fit) and Petite mal (little fit).I have lots of petite mals,which I guess falls under the definition of rancor...you piss me off and I get over it quickly.I have had one gran mal that stays with me to this day,it is a feeling of resentment that will never go away.and it's name is Andy Hines.I hate that motherfucker.He's lucky I'm just depressed and not psychotic,otherwise he would be dead and I'd be in prison.I've learned to let go of most things,but this hatred remains as fresh as the day he shit on me and my family,and that's just the way it is.If I saw him on the street I would kick his ass with not a word spoken.
That is a grudge.
You can't carry things around with you in life,it weighs you down and makes everything else more difficult.But sometimes you just can't let things go until you think of a way to make it right,and in the case of Andy Hines-I'm still thinking.
Oh wait...now I'm talking about revenge.Revenge is sweet.Revenge is a dish best served cold.
Now I'm in cliche town.
So maybe when it's all said and done you need one good grudge to get you up in the morning.
Or maybe not.