UNSUNG

I don't usually post about this sort of thing but it's been eating at me for a while now and quite frankly my feelings are a bit bruised. I made this CD and sent out copies to several people who are important to me - some more than others and they are important for different reasons. And I have heard feedback from exactly one of those people.I'm not trying to be a crybaby and this is not a general indictment...I know people are busy with life and the terrain they are deployed on , but there is one in particular that puzzles me.
Back in the day (and this is way back in the day) we fostered her aspirations and went out of our way to encourage her...we recorded her first demo here at Club Spit and she has gone on to enjoy more success than we have and while that's all good...Oh fuck it...I really don't care when you get down to it.I'm at work on the next one and will keep plugging away until I can't plug anymore...but it still sucks to feel like a footnote to someone you love.
I knew I couldn't do this kind of post and I will never do one again.Promise.

I'm working on a new song that involves the kick drum to help me keep time and add some punch...here's the set up...

And I made dinner...Garlic and ginger infused shoulder roast with brown rice and dinner rolls with brown gravy...and a cucumber salad with roasted garlic and sour cream...I also cut the fuck out of my left index finger pulling one of those bowls out of the sink...caught a knife blade , go figure.


EGO diligo ut crustulum quod planto music

WINDING DOWN

That's what this job is doing...it's the pre punch list punch list of detail type tasks and scrambling to fix things that are wrong or have been overlooked.Needless to say, the owners didn't get the key today...it'll be awhile and it's every trades "fault".Except for the HVAC guys...they bailed yesterday at lunch.But you can be sure , they will be back.
There have been eight revised prints , so some of the onus falls on the architects and engineers (not that they'll ever admit it).
I spent the day trimming out recessed lighting mostly...one of them was missing an essential bracket so I had to make one out of found material , of course most of the material that I needed has long since been removed from the site but I managed to cobble together something that worked out actually better than the original missing part.At the end of the day a box with an extra complete unit was found.So while I wasted my time I gained improvisational experience points if it happens again (and it will). I also installed receptacle covers...joy.Many people install the receptacles themselves and some are too far into the wall - some are too far out...they are mostly crooked and what would seem a mindless easy task becomes an exercise in geometry.Some lack needed spacers and move around too much.It sucks.From my experience there is one way to install a receptacle...the right way - once.
We are working tomorrow (ka-ching!)I welcome the overtime even though it bites into the weekend.$$$...need it.
Annabelle suggested pinwheel flank steaks with spinach and feta cheese with baked potato.I thought it was such a good idea I baked the potatoes twice with cheddar cheese and sour cream.I love my food processor.I also got some honey wheat dinner rolls to go with the gravy we don't need for the potatoes anymore since I got all crazy with them.I found a bad ass spoon rest that was marked down to 98 cents and some cool dinner plates for 2.99 tonight.The spoon rest is doubling as a flatware rest for camera purposes.

What did you have for dinner tonight?
Have a good weekend...

IRENE SAYS...

... It's cold Dad...

QUESTIONS

From Texas Oasis...

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
My Dad and an uncle.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I heard In the arms of an angel at work on Friday , and tried as I might not to , some tears popped out-not a good idea to weep on a construction site :P

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
No...

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Boarshead garlic Bologna.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
1 son , 1 daughter in law , 3 grandkids and 2 doggies.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Yeah...I believe so.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Frequently.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
When I was 7 I fell while running with a toy gun.The barrel went down my throat and almost cut them completely off.I also almost cut off my uvula as well and missed my jugular by a fraction of an inch.I also scared the hell out of my Mom.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
No.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
cocoa pebbles.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Yes.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Breyers nestle crunch.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Affect.

15. RED OR PINK?
Red.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My ever so receding hairline.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
My Mom.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
-------

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
wheatstraw dickies jeans , black timberland boots.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Some video game Ann's playing.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Turquoise.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Patchouli , Hashish , Puppies.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Ann.

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Never met her , but she's a good read.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
It used to be baseball...but I don't watch any sports except for the Iditarod sometimes.

27. HAIR COLOR?
Blonde...sort of.

28. EYE COLOR?
Blue.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No.

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
I have many...french fries with mustard...roast beef...chili...Chorizo egg and cheese tacos...

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The outlaw Josey Wales.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Black with a red dickies logo.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Winter.

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Can I have both?

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
----
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
----

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
I'm not.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Spongebob.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
Nothing.

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S).
Guitar.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Stones.

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Europe.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I have a knack for off the cuff lyrics.

46 WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Long Island , NY - sssshhhhh ! :P

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
---

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
Work.

I AM NOT A JUGGALO

But my son was once...allow me to explain.
I went to 7-11 this after to get smokes and the girl cashier said she liked my shirt...

We had the following exchange...
Girl: I like your shirt...
Me: Thanks...I really wanted to wear my white devil shirt but it was dirty...
Girl (touching 7-11 tunic) : If I could wear anything but this thing I'd be wearing my hatchet man shirt...

Me: Yeah...those are cool...
Girl: I'm a Juggalo 24/7...are you a Juggalo?
Me : (containing desire to pee on myself laughing) No...but my son was when he was about 14...Chicken hunting was our favorite song.

Girl (having what I guess was a juggalorgasm ) That is so my favorite song too!
What a fucked up world we live in...I love it.

REVENGE AND REDEMPTION

I watched The Outlaw Josey Wales for probably the bajillionth time tonight. I love westerns and I especially love westerns with Clint in them. He directed this one in the twilight of the big screen western and had to fight to get it made. Good on him.
It's a great story with good casting and all the elements of a great revenge / redemption film. "Your words of death have iron...as do your words of life"..."I reckon"...wow.
And this on the heels of Tombstone...Val Kilmer has never been better..."I'm yer huckleberry"...I love that line and try to use it whenever possible.And Dana Delaney is smoking hot...what a beautiful woman she is.
I would have liked to live in those days.
But instead I did electrical work today...ladder intensive stuff again ,being it was a Saturday it was more relaxed.No hard hat and the sheet rockers were blasting that horrible Mexican pop music from their shitty boom boxes and in protest I walked around singing "Chingaaaa! Chinga tu madre putaaaaa!* I'm yer motherfucking Chinga dero"!(*Mother fucking whore) They didn't like that very much and after some sideways comments to my crew (Much more of this shit and I'm gonna run out into the traffic...it's bad enough we have to be here on a Saturday , but to have to endure this bullshit music is a bit much ) in earshot of the offenders they finally turned it off.
If we work next Saturday I'm bringing my box and sharing The Jesus Lizard with them.
Ha.
So I only get one day of rest this weekend , but I made a half a weeks pay in 8 hours and it went by fast.
I guess I can't complain...
Enjoy your Sunday.:)

TEN POUNDS OF SHIT IN A FIVE POUND SACK

It never ceases to amaze me how I can fit my body into spaces where it was never meant to be. I think about that old TV show "that's incredible" where the giant dude fits himself into a tiny cube...this isn't it but it's close...

I think I set a record for hand cuts today...I nicked myself up real good on my hands and arms cramming myself into these tight places. I am afraid some of my ink leaked out :).
We are are working on Saturday (Ka-ching!) and then 10's starting on Monday (Ka-ching!!) I say get it while you can.

FORGOTTEN THINGS

I have spent the last 2 days installing cut in switch boxes and running flexible conduit up inside finished walls above the ceiling grid where they terminate in surface mounted boxes.Three rooms that have to be tied together and then terminate at the panel on the same circuit.These 3 rooms somehow got forgotten for the rough in...when there was no sheet rock on the studs and the ceilings were open.
How did this happen ? I don't know...it's on the print. Yet somehow it was overlooked.
Now , while some might find this situation annoying , I do not.
It's like navigating a maze. The cut in boxes etc. are pretty straight forward , but the tying in is a challenge what with so many things in the way.
I'll button this little project up by lunch tomorrow and these rooms will have lighting (2x4 lay in fixtures)-still have to install those- that operate by occupancy sensors.And then it's off to the next mission.
They expect us to turn over the job to the owners in 7 days time...we'll see. No lay offs (allegedly)in the immediate future. We'll see about that as well.
I'll get my first full check since right before Christmas this Thursday and Annabelle and I can begin to catch up.Whew to that.

I almost forgot...we have a new President and first lady...look at them.
Awesome innit?
Someone to wash away the obscenities of the last 8 years...someone who can complete a coherent thought...someone who has our interests at heart. And someone who clearly loves his partner.What more could you ask for?

Bread Making
I've posted before about how much I love to bake bread and I used to do it a lot (as in several times a week) back when I was in my teens and twenties. Haven't done it so much the last 15 years, but this is one case where money was not a factor - it's very cheap to make bread. Instead, lack of time, kitchen counters at the wrong height and arthritis played a bigger role. I did have a mixer with dough hooks, but it made lousy dough and was a poor substitute for hand kneading. Not too long ago I bought a bread machine thinking that was the answer, but that turned out to make mediocre bread no matter what recipe I used. Now it may be true that mediocre home made bread is better than store bought, but it's very disappointing when one is used to fabulous home made bread so the bread machine has not gotten very much use. But yesterday I was craving home made bread and I looked at Rob's roaster oven and wondered if it would make a good little bread oven. It's the perfect size and I would assume it provides very even heat. There's no window to peek through, but I've always used my nose to tell me when the bread is done so that didn't matter. I got out the bread machine and used that to knead a very simple test dough of yeast, water, general purpose flour and a bit of salt. I've never pulled the dough out of the machine before (I always left it in to cook) so I was surprised to see what a good job of kneading it had done. I still think there is no substitute for hand kneading, but this was pretty damn close. I then baked it in the roaster oven and it turned out surprisingly well. If you saw the picture then you can see that I skimped quite a bit on the last rise, but it still turned out a light and fluffy loaf of plain white bread. Boring, but still tasty. Time to try some more exciting recipes, although recipe isn't really the right word since I don't follow any thing written. More exciting ingredients might be a better way to put it. What I find so fun about bread making is how the ingredients change the bread - milk does one thing, honey another, eggs something else, and butter does this but oil does that. It's a tasty combination of art and science, both of which I love, but neither of which I get to do at my day job.

SIMPLE

I haven't made these in a while , but it seemed like a good idea tonight.Mini cheeseburgers on Hawaiian sweet rolls.Very simple and very tasty.Along with some steak fries...yes.

Irene is back to her normal old self much to my relief , and I can only surmise that my theory about the cold and her fall from the tree was correct.
Overall it was a nice laid back Sunday...watched some CSI and I,robot and basically hung out on the bed with the d-o-g-s all day with the exception of making dinner.
Annabelle is baking some bread so the house is filled with warm happy smells of cooking and baking.
And here's Annabelle's bread...

SORE BONES

Irene was not her usual self this evening...moving slowly and while she went for her ride she walked slowly straight to the car and crawled in rather than making laps around the yard and jumping into the car on command.She sat differently in the seat and had a troubled look on her face the whole time.She didn't react excitedly when we approached the house on the way back.She showed no interest in a second bonus ride (!?).So I went alone :(.
Stuff like this really messes with me...it brings up all kinds of bad memories of dogs lost.Needless to say , I am very attached to her and the thought of her being ill worries me to no end.But...her nose is cold and she has an appetite.She is also 8 years old and fell out of a tree a while back.Yeah , I know...stupid dad and his camera.
It's been steady cold for a few days and damp today to boot.Poor baby is just sore.I examined her with gentle hand pressure and she winced when I got mid way down her back.
So , there it is-I hope.
You can be sure I will be watching her like a hawk this weekend.It's suppose to warm up tomorrow as well...
I burned through 150 ft of metal clad cable today running the control circuit for 4 safety disconnects for exhaust fans.The disconnects are ceiling mounted and weigh in excess of 30 pounds...mounting them was a real treat.They were located in the four corners of the kitchen and had to be tied together on the same circuit.The whole day on various ladders cramming myself into impossibly tight spots navigating around a maze of HVAC stuff , fire protection stuff and data stuff. It took all day and I still need to button it up on Monday.I'm pleased with how it turned out and I got this bonus Arc flash hazard sticker...actually 2-one for the hard hat and one for my guitar.That poor stick figure guy-always getting electrocuted , blown up or falling off a ladder.:)

Out of Sorts
I have decided not to go by the coffee shop tonight because not only is it friggin' cold outside (cold, that is, for these parts of the country) but also nothing has gone right for me since I came home from work. Including computer stuff which usually works for me even when it won't work for anyone else. And with the latest addition of almost having a head-on collision with a crazed driver, I've decided I'm staying put at the house with a cup of hot chocolate that I'm going to top off with some Crown Royal whiskey. I may even drink three cups at this rate because I am cold and frustrated and what could go wrong with hot chocolate and whiskey - don't anwer that.

I can't play my on-line game tonight (my account is fubar which is part of the previous mentioned computer woes) and Friday night TV sucks even for those who do like to watch TV (and I'm not one of them. ) I decided to work on the floor plan of that office complex I want to build someday, but I couldn't get the architecture program to work. I can sort of build it in the Sims 2 game or at least have a little fun with the concept, but that game won't load either. Sigh. Guess it's back to good old paper and pencil. At the rate I'm divesting myself of technology, I'll be doing cave drawings with charcoal in a month from now.

FUCK YEAH...

WELL , OK THEN

I didn't get laid off today. Good on that...and they expect us to be done in 10 working days which won't happen unless the remaining crew works a shit load of overtime.
Our foreman said that if it's approved we can work as much as we want until the job is finished. If that ends up being the case , I plan on 5 / 12's and 8 on Saturday. Which will make for some nice checks. We'll see.
The guys that got laid off today had very different reactions...one was pitching a fit about his check not being available until 2 or 3 pm and argued to the point that he got run off before lunch (without his check). The other stayed and worked til 3 without complaint.
I know both pretty well , so it was no surprise to me , but , if you were a new observer you would have figured it the other way around based on appearances alone.
It's just like I've always said...

Back to work?
I went back to work Tuesday having managed to wrangle a temporary modified workload with less multitasking and fewer supervisor calls. This has restored my confidence in my ability to do a job of some sort and provided some desperately needed income, but today I was reminded just how much this particular job sucks. I was talking to an angry, profanity spewing customer that would not accept that fact that he was talking to the wrong department and I suppose I could have listened to his tirade for an hour if I hadn't finally broken the rules and hung up on him. There is no way I get paid enough to keep talking to a man that has just said, "Fuck you, you fucking useless fuck." Actually, I don't think anyone gets paid enough to stay engaged in that sort of conversation and while this example is at the extreme end of things, truth is that most calls are pretty much the same as this one if you take the profanity out of the conversation.

Man, I have got to find some other way to make a living. So far, applying for other jobs isn't working. And temp work doesn't seem to be the answer either since I keep getting told by the temp agencies that they have nothing for me other than another call center job. Eeeech.

I need to find a different approach and I just got an email that there's a coffee shop in a nearby neighborhood that is under new management. I'm thinking about stopping by tomorrow afternoon to check it out. Maybe if the "vibe" is right, I'll ask if they are hiring for that early morning shift that the college students never seem to want to work. Who knows, could be the perfect job considering how much I love coffee, breakfast and customers. Well, unless the customers are screaming at me over the phone - then I don't love them so much.

P.S. The coffee shop's sign is lime green... people that know me will understand...

LAY IN LIGHTING , SAFETY DISCONNECTS W/ RELAYS AND IMPENDING LAY OFFS

I fell easily back into the groove after the first day...I mean , driving a shovel beats being at home in pain any day , right?
I've been working up on ladders since going back which plays hell on my feet but I just keep rotating those boots.
It's been colder here of late and I've been digging that.
As this job winds down it's hard to justify the 14 guys on the crew...I can see it happening , material and equipment getting taken off sight , pre punch list stuff in the works...I've seen it before on countless jobs and what follows is lay offs.
I have made the cut so far so we'll see what happens tomorrow.
While I would prefer to keep working I haven't had a real break in a long time. If I get laid off I will go to the hall and sign the books and draw unemployment until I get a call.
That potential reality used to send me into a panic , but , for some reason I'm cool with it. I'm much cooler with staying on with my current contractor , but I've been with them from the beginning - a real feat in this trade.
I haven't said anything about Annabelle's recent difficulties and I won't now except to say that it's disconcerting to watch someone so vibrant and capable slowly begin to unravel. I don't know what's going on - and being a person who lives to know what's going on - it's not easy to watch that happen and not have a solution for it.
Time will tell I guess , and in the meantime I will be here , just like always. It's the least I can do.
I'll let you know if I make the cut tomorrow...

BILLY BOY

Have I ever told you about this guy before? I'm sure I have - because besides being my friend for 30 odd years , he's been my drummer since 19 and 85.

I called him just to shoot the shit for a few and I told him I had a copy of PonyRide for him...he said he was coming into town and would stop by to pick it up.He ended up hanging out for a couple of hours...
I used lightscribe to burn images onto the discs...very cool.
It was an awesome visit.
Ann and I agreed after he left to go home...there should be more Billy Boy's in the world.
A truer friend I've never had before and probably won't have again.

THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY OFFENSIVE ON SO MANY LEVELS

I love it...:)

I WISH( or - I HAVE CROSSED MYSELF IN ANGER )

The next dog I get I'm going to train him or her to scare children...not to bite them or anything , just menace them on command.
Let me explain...
I have these neighbors who have a son my age only he's a bigger loser than me.He had kids who ended up being raised by his parents because he was in jail or off being a crack head or whatever.They grew up to have kids who are being raised by the now great grandparents. (I've lived here for a LONG time.)
These kids are fucking feral and they are relegated to the yard on a daily basis for hours at a time where they scream and yell and howl and basically make our lives miserable.There is virtually no adult supervision.
I have been biting my tongue because for a period of time our band tormented them with our own version of screaming and yelling and howling and they were cool with it.
But enough is fucking enough.
Tonight the children were in a truck in the driveway yelling and screaming and honking the horn...nary an "adult" to be seen.
I lost it.
I went outside and yelled at the top of my lungs- "HEY!That's ENOUGH...CHILL the FUCK OUT!"
They just honked the horn some more.A clear indication that the adults in their lives are worthless when it comes to limits...so I followed that up with "I'm serious you FUCKING BRATS!"
And lo and behold they complied...You see , when the adults do intervene with these monkeys it's in the form of profanity , verbal abuse and threats...we've heard it-many times over.
So that's why I want a menacing on command dog...one who bites only when I tell them to...

COLOGNE...

Ben Folds...



11 grand pianos...and a choir...and scantily clad people with tambourines and toms... wow.

DEPTHMARKER STATS

We will celebrate 6 years of doing this thing on April 26th. But cluster maps gave us an early present by archiving our visitors by year. Here's where our readers came from from 01-10-08 to 01-10 09...

US - United States 4,911
GB - United Kingdom 501
CA - Canada 71
IE - Ireland 48
EU - Europe 24
FR - France 21
AU - Australia 14
GR - Greece 11
KY - Cayman Islands 9
DE - Germany 8
PH - Philippines 6
TR - Turkey 5
MX - Mexico 5
NL - Netherlands 5
NZ - New Zealand 4
ES - Spain 4
RO - Romania 4
IN - India 4
BR - Brazil 3
JP - Japan 3
SA - Saudi Arabia 3
RS - Serbia 2
KR - Korea, Republic of 2
IT - Italy 2
CH - Switzerland 2
HK - Hong Kong 2
CZ - Czech Republic 2
BE - Belgium 2
PY - Paraguay 2
VN - Vietnam 2
NI - Nicaragua 2
SI - Slovenia 2
TW - Taiwan 2
HU - Hungary 1
SE - Sweden 1
FI - Finland 1
LT - Lithuania 1
AT - Austria 1
PL - Poland 1
SK - Slovakia 1
LI - Liechtenstein 1
MT - Malta 1
MY - Malaysia 1
CI - Cote D'Ivoire 1
CR - Costa Rica 1
ID - Indonesia 1
AR - Argentina 1
ZA - South Africa 1
VE - Venezuela 1
PR - Puerto Rico 1
CN - China 1
PT - Portugal 1
MK - Macedonia 1
MA - Morocco 1
IL - Israel 1
BD - Bangladesh 1
PK - Pakistan 1
HR - Croatia 1

Pretty cool...

Schrödinger's cat at 5:00 AM
I woke up this morning and found myself precariously balanced on the edge of the bed with the two dogs pressed against me as they occupied the space where I normally sleep. It was a little chilly in the room and what better way for a dog to stay warm than to sandwich itself between two heat producing humans? Judging from the pain in my back, I had been sleeping that way for quite some time and going back to sleep wasn't an option.

My thoughts drifted to the blood draw I had yesterday and how someone was going to be doing whatever it is that they do with blood to come up with those numbers and statistics that are supposed to tell a doctor what is going on with my body. And since the act of observation changes the property of what is being observed, I wondered how many times the property of that blood was going to change before the results ended up in my doctor's hands. Did it changed the while the phlebotomist watched it flow into the tube? Did it change when someone looked at it to put it in a machine? How about a machine's observation? Does that have any effect at all or is this just something that humans do? For that matter, is it just humans or does the observation of any conscious being affect the property of an item? And what defines a conscious being? Is there any reason to think a rock is less sentient than a human?

And then I thought, why am I thinking about this at at 5:00 AM in the morning? Which led to a much more important question. Why hadn't I been thinking like this at 5:00 AM in the morning? This sort of thinking is as natural as breathing to me, or rather, it used to be that was the norm instead of the exception. But I can't remember the last time that I had that sort of imaginative flight of fancy which is so much fun to do. I suspect it was a long, long time ago.

I was hoping this sudden burst of creative thinking meant that the "brain fog" was gone. Alas, upon arising and taking Rob to work, I discovered that problem is most definitely still there. There's nothing quite like doing half a dozen stupid things before breakfast.

Ah well, time to go find my car keys since I just noticed that it's my purse hanging on the key hook instead of the keys. You see, the dogs need to go out and I need those keys to unlock the back door, however, they are currently nowhere to be found. Gotta be here somewhere...

P.S. Although I pointed to stress as the most likely culprit for my current absent-mindedness, my doctor disagrees and thinks something else is the cause.

ENCHEES!

I made enchiladas tonight...two small batches to accommodate our particular preferences...
These are sliced roast beef with guisada sauce and sour cream with Monterrey jack cheese...
And for Annabelle...


Jack and cheddar cheese with red sauce.
Tasty.
I did lay in lighting today...lots of ladder time but I wore different boots so it wasn't so bad on the feet.Students are already moving in to the upper floor dorm rooms...it's a bit disconcerting to see these kids wandering around an active construction site , but who am I to say , right?

FIRST DAY BACK

I went back to work today and when it was over I was exhausted.I haven't been on my feet (or in boots for that matter) for 8 hours in over a week. The crew was glad to see me , and that experience always amazes me..."they missed me , wow".
After the handshakes and the questions it was off to a change order project that involved lots of high work and ladder time...throw me right back into it.
The physical plant has changed a lot as well...where there was once dirt is now grass, the pavilion is full of pave stones.The changes were dramatic...this job is winding down.
For lunch I went to Flacos with Ricky Ricardo...Since I'm on soft foods I decided to try the menudo...big mistake.That stuff smells like shit but tastes good , but my brain could not over ride the shit smell...it is made from stomach lining after all...from the taste. I will NEVER eat that shit again...nor did I finish a third of that bowl of cow bowel...ugh.
Very nasty.
I spent most of the evening in bed with Annabelle and the doggies...I could get used to this.
And considering there is another round of lay offs slated for tomorrow it may be unemployment time...

Onward through the Fog
Brain Fog, Fuzzy Thinking, Memory Loss - call it what you will, but so far it's been the most annoying aspect of whatever is going on with me. Multitasking used to be my specialty, but these days I have trouble doing just one thing, much less many things at once.

I'll give you an example. This morning I was going to make myself some scrambled eggs for breakfast. I got the eggs out of the refrigerator, lit the stove and set the butter in the pan to melt while I got a bowl out of the cabinet. I set the bowl on the counter and turned around to get the eggs (which were on the other counter next to the stove) and promptly cracked the eggs into the pan and made fried eggs instead. Now, I didn't consciously decide to make fried eggs, it just happened. Later, after the eggs were cooked and eaten, I headed back into the kitchen to wash the plate when I noticed the bowl on the counter and wondered why it was there. It took me a while, but I did eventually remember that I was going to make scrambled eggs. Of course, in this situation, it didn't matter where the eggs were fried or scrambled, it was still breakfast.

Something tells me there's a good metaphor in that story if I could only concentrate on it. But I can't so I think I'll go do whatever it is I was thinking about doing earlier... it involved something to do with the bedroom... laundry perhaps?

HA HA...

SCORE

Since I've been off for more than a week I've been nosing around in the back room for some halloween pictures (that I haven't found ) but I found my harmonicas that have been missing for years and I found some video. Not the video I was looking for but video I forgot we even had.
First I found a video marked "Halloween '95" and it's us with the time bombs here at Clubspit central with the Boxers Diamond and Skeeter doing crowd control...they were funny like that.Skeeter was the stage bouncer and Diamond worked the crowd.
Then I found a video from "Halloween '94 at Mike and Denice's"...our first live performance ever.That's where we got our rug.
It's hard to imagine we have been making music together for 15 years , but we have.
A testimony to friendship more than anything else
Amazing stuff.
I will digitize this stuff as soon as I can and share it with you...
I go to bed with a smile on my face and a beating in my heart.

GONE

The bane of my existence is gone! And for under 200 bucks! It took some time for the feeling to return to my face , but other than adjusting to the new topography in my mouth I feel much better.
Below is the "source of my infection"...

Nasty looking bastard , eh?

An interesting start to the new year
"Here comes your 19th nervous breakdown"
Okay, so I've never had even one nervous breakdown, but this last month I had to wonder if I was about to have my first. There's no denying that I have a job that's very stressful and that it gets even worse around the holidays. This year, I slowly lost my ability to manage that job in December. Multitasking became extremely difficult, I started forgetting things, I would confuse one companies policies with another, I failed to follow up on issues and last week I lost my ability to keep my cool on supervisor calls. For some reason, I wasn't able to do the things I was best at so last Monday I asked my boss for some time off to get myself together before something bad happened on a call. I only got an extra day and let me tell you, it wasn't enough. Last Friday was one of the worst days I have ever had at work and I managed to screw up quite a few calls. And the mental fog doesn't just exist at work, it happens at home as well. For example, I just grabbed a coffee filter in my attempt to make a cup of tea and well, the coffee filter is not used in any way to make a cup of tea around here. I know everyone does things like that on occasion, but for me recently, it's the sort of thing that happens very often in the course of just one day.

So maybe it's stress or maybe it's perimenopause (there are other signs and symptoms that point to that as the culprit) or maybe I have just lost my mind. Either way, I'm in quite the predicament since I have essentially lost my means of income because I will get fired if I continue to work in this condition. And folks it's not even the getting fired that concerns me, but the fact that the customers get screwed over even more when I mess up on a call and that's not good for anyone involved.

I'll be seeing a doctor, though I don't think it's going to do any good or provide any sort of quick fix. But I figure I might as well use my health insurance one last time because the moment I turn in my resignation or get fired, the insurance is gone. There's also the fact that answers and solutions to problems often come from where I least expect it so I'm going to go with the flow on this one. We'll see what happens... I think it's going to be a very interesting year.

THIS IS REALLY GETTING FUCKING OLD

OK...so the pills were fun for a while , but now they just dull the pain and make me retarded. The antibiotics did their thing and my infection is gone.
So I call the oral surgeons office this morning and when they find out I'll be paying out of pocket give me a run down on the fees...way out of my range let me tell you.If they were trying to scare me off it worked.So I call the dentist I saw last week and all of a sudden he's got cold feet and refers me to a clinic with a sliding scale.
I remember when paying in cash was a plus...So I check this place out and find the following review on line...

The desk staff is very rude and condescending. They are not helpful and give incorrect and incomplete information on how to use their system and services. When I complained about the incomplete information, I was called a liar and told I missed an appt. for the day before. I didn’t’ have an appt and was trying to bring in a homeless man for an emergency visit for a severe toothache. I was told to be there by 7:30AM as that is when they take emergencies. However, when I got there I was told I need to be there at 6:30am she says and sign up as they only take the first five on the list as emergencies. I hope this wasn’t because the man I was helping is Caucasian and not Hispanic, but I am not convinced. Fortunately, Economy Dental stepped up and helped me with immediate and low cost dental service to a needy person. They were polite and respectful and gave me the information I needed.

Pros: I'm sure good service if they want to help you.

Cons: Don't be white.

Nice...So I called economy dental and I'm going to see them tomorrow morning. I'm glad the infection is resolved , but the pain has been almost unbearable if not for the pills and the anbesol.
In addition to that I have missed a week of work, I pulled the rest of my vacation fund to cover that loss of pay and the dentist bill , but I was planning on using that money for christmas for the grand kids...we'll pull it off somehow I'm sure.I'm gonna clean up our house drum set for Sean (it's better than anything we could buy him plus it has the karma).
Sometimes I just want to roll over and piss on myself like a dog who's been beat.
But you guys know me better than that.I'm just sayin'

ENGRAVER...
I have an engraver...and I did this to a perfectly helpless chrome zippo lighter...I got done with that first cross bone and said "fuck it".Annabelle says it's cute...I say otherwise.
Have I said I love the Band of Horses ? They rule. A patchwork of my life if there ever was one.
I have been a lot of things in my life and I have seen some amazing things - believe me.
But today was a killer...The other day LT dropped off a VCR tape of the baby shower.I thought we had a VCR around here somewhere, but I apparently shot it full of holes and tossed it out.They don't make them anymore...at the stores I went to anyway.Much to the amusement to the sales staff I asked if one existed and they looked at me like I asked for a unicorn.
But old friends come through.I called Al to give him my new number and asked "Do you by any chance have a VCR"? He said yes.And he gave it to me (as opposed to a lend) and he brought it to me.Man...I am lucky to have such good friends...
So...anyway-within the hour I had a brand new VCR with which to watch the tape.
And watch it I did...grand babies dancing around chewing on our mics-pounding on the drums...little rock stars.
I was hypnotized...grainy VCR memories...McKenzie on my lap playing my ASAT.
A kiss and a hug.
And this film plays on...people close to me coming in and out of the frame, my son...his wife...my band mates...my Annabelle.
Frozen in time.
It was a moment.
A moment in time dedicated to love.
Have I mentioned Band of Horses? Seriously...check them out.

FIRST HIKE IN '09


We went to twin falls...It was a perfect winter morning , mid 40's , gray skies , no one else around to harsh our buzz.
I did not pose Irene in that circle of stones...really , she did it all on her own.
A very nice hike to break in the new year...

THREE NIGHTS

Love this song.I made this this morning-enjoy...


Go ahead...stick...me...

DIG LAZARUS DIG...

This is where I've been for a solid (almost) week , and they have been by my side the whole time.Except for the couple of days that Theo's hips hurt so bad he cried a lot and couldn't get on the bed.Even then he was at the foot or the side of the bed.
Bod commented on the time capsule picture , wondering when it was time to dig it up. I decided that it was time today. So I packed a shovel in the car and drove over there. The main building is an architect firm and the out buildings are leased out to other businesses. I haven't been on this property since they shut us down in '94.
I figured no one would be home , but there were some graphics designers there occupying the side of the duplex where my favorite primary kid stayed.I told him the story and showed him the picture.There was this stick protruding from the ground for no real reason and after we looked at the picture it appeared to be close to the spot where I was driving the shovel. Go ahead and dig they said.
I did...it wasn't the spot-or I didn't dig down deep enough.But as I was digging I was looking around and remembering those days, those kids, that team.
I shared some stories with those guys and directed them under the stairs in the main house to some graffiti my primary and I left there all those years ago in her safe place.
Maybe I did dig deep enough after all.
Somebody else should find that capsule...not me.

RELAPSE

As is my habit , I felt better yesterday and assuming I was still young and bulletproof overdid it. I spent the entire day today in bed asleep with the dogs , who did not leave my side.( good friends them...)
And this evening has been much more slowly paced.
But I had to share these with you...

New Years party in 93 I think...Me and part of my "cadre of mental health professionals"...Yeah , you bet. Seriously , these two were good team members for very different reasons...I valued diversity.
And here we are a year later burying our time capsule when they shut our center down...yes I am wearing a tie and loafers.
I miss those guys...

PIROGI'S !
You can tell I'm feeling better when I can drag my ass out of bed , bathe my stinky , greasy haired self , clean up the beard and go to the grocery not once but twice.Because I'm still kinda dingy from the pills and forgot the pie crusts.
I originally intended on making mini meat pies , or as the seen and be seen types around here call them "Aussie pies".
Please , I was eating meat pie before I was out of diapers.Anyway...the cupcake pan we had was shallower than I remember,so I opted for perogi's...baked in the roaster.
Ann raved about the crust (and she's a baker !)
THEN I TOOK A TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE (WHILE THEY WERE BAKING)....
I was looking for some old Halloween pictures for a friend...no luck , but I found these golden oldies...enjoy.
Me and Annabelle at the Chuy's photo booth on Barton Springs right before the wedding...wow..
Our wedding party...
On our honeymoon in the Rio Grande National Forest in Colorado with Diamond and Cypress.
Wolves@th'door cover shoot for Teen Beat magazine! Just kidding , but damn...no wrinkles!

HAPPY NEW YEAR ?

No partying...carousing , or even silliness here at ClubSpit this time around.Just in bed with the dogs watching old Clint Eastwood westerns and CSI.If it wasn't for my deflicted mouth , it would have been very nice.
We got a bottle of champagne , but it sits unopened in the fridge. Another day...
Ann was feeling kind of yucky yesterday too and she spent a good portion of her day in the bed with us watching TV (?!)
The antibiotics seem to be working as I feel little to no "presence" of the infection.

Third tooth going left to right...that large black area around the top is where the bone used to be , the white area below surrounding the root is the infection.Nice , huh?