Odds and Ends
Those who have read this blog over the years know I'm constantly trying to come to terms with my job. I've tried a couple of different things over the last few months. First I tried to just ignore stuff and not make any effort to correct problems. That didn't work so I then tried to just notify the powers that be about problems without pushing for a solution. That didn't work either. Last week I decided to not try anything and just do what came naturally. This resulted in my volunteering to come in on my day off to handle some stuff that carried over from the day before and noticing a schedule snafu next week where no one was scheduled in the Austin office so I volunteered to trade a cushy shift on a day that we were over staffed for a day that's sure to be miserable because I will be the only one working. Yeah, maybe I'm an idiot, but my heart said it was the right thing to do. I know I won't get any appreciation for it, but that wasn't why I did it. I did it because it needed to be done and it felt "right". And I came to realize the conflict I feel over doing things like that comes from all the people around me that tell me it isn't the right thing to do and that I'm letting my employer take advantage of me and any number of other negative comments. And maybe all I need to do to be happier in my job is to stop listening to all that stuff and just do what comes naturally. Or maybe not. Who knows, but I figure if I ever manage to learn whatever lesson I'm supposed to learn at this job then it will be over and I'll move on to other things. For now, perhaps I should just make the best of this swamp that I'm in. Because even swamps have orchids; you just have to look hard to find them.

Last week we had a pretty bad storm during the night that kept me awake from the tree branches hitting the roof. It was pretty scary, what with being woke up in the middle of the night and all and I found myself praying that a big branch or tree didn't come crashing down and crush the roof/house. Now I'm a fairly spiritual person, but not by conventional means and while I have my own version of prayer, it's rare that it ever is about me personally. I might "pray" for other people or about my concerns for the world, but I'd be hard pressed to remember a recent time when I actually asked for something for myself. Which is pretty damn stupid. Much like a lottery where you can't win if you don't play, it's a bit hard to receive if you don't ask in the first place.

Well, that's enough navel gazing for the night. Here's hoping that everyone who has a holiday weekend has a fantastic one.