AUSTINS OWN I.E.D'S

I've been seeing them in parking lots around Austin forever,and never really thought them dangerous.Until today.I went to the corner for smokes and as I was getting out of the car,I narrowly missed stepping directly on one.The results could be different with each triggering,you could slip and fall releasing a small ammonia cloud,or you could do all that and end up having your foot coated in shit...baby shit.
Yes,I'm referring to disposable diapers.
Let us explore for a moment what goes through the minds of these terrorists.Oh!My baby soiled his diaper while I was shopping at HEB.I'll change the baby in the parking lot.After the change the terrorist looks around thinking what to do with this "infant explosive device".And they inevitably decide that leaving it in the parking lot is the logical conclusion,and toss it to the ground and drive away,and it sits,cooking in the sun,waiting for a victim.
Oh!The humanity!
I think an innovative way to combat this problem is for judges to demand offenders who receive community service as part of the sentence to be "mine sweepers" and be required to drive to the malls and groceries and corner stores and diffuse them.Before someone else gets hurt (or at the very least,stinky and nauseas).