Welcoming 2011

My preferred champagne has gone up to $40 for a small bottle, so this year I'm trying one from Spain, Segura Viudas Aria Estate Brut Cava, which was only $15 and supposedly fits my request for something bone dry and not very fruity. Plus, I have FIREWORKS! I haven't shot off fireworks in... it's been so long I don't remember. And I had no idea fireworks were so cheap. That little group in the picture there cost less than $20. Woo-hoo! I'm so excited that I'm not sure I can wait the five hours until midnight. I just might have to celebrate early.

Post-midnight update:

I was able to make it until midnight and our little group of revelers toasted the New Year right on time. Ah, good times, good friends & neighbors and good sparkling wine. T'was an excellent way to kick off the new calendar year.

It's an extra coffee morning

I had a great time last night, despite the cloud cover that moved in and prevented me from watching the eclipse. It was so nice and warm outside - 65 degrees - that I stayed up way past midnight enjoying the outdoors and my rockin' mini-bonfire. I bought a bag of mesquite chunks that turned out to be regular firewood cut into 4 to 6 inch long pieces. That allowed me to have the fun of an actual log fire, instead of just burning some wood chunks. And well, campfires are a bit addictive for me so I stayed up later than I should have because I kept saying, "Just one more log on the fire and then I'll go to bed." Then again, if I had been able to see the eclipse, I probably would have stayed up even later than that so I guess in a way, I came out ahead sleep-wise. Anyway, I need to sign off now and go make another pot of coffee here at work. Apparently I'm not the only one needing a few extra cups this morning.

Lunar Eclipse and Winter Solstice!

I've very excited about this and while I can't stay up the whole night to watch the whole event, I'm hoping I can at least stay up long enough to watch it start. It might be too cloudy to actually see the eclipse, but I'm going to give it a shot. I used to have a tradition of lighting a fire on Winter Solstice and although that's technically tomorrow night, I'm going to light the fire tonight instead. The fire won't be a real campfire because the the RV park doesn't allow ground fires, but I plan to burn wood chunks in my BBQ grill and that will be close enough.

I've always considered the Solstice to be the real start of the new year, not January 1st, and I think it's pretty awesome that I have a lunar eclipse marking the start of the first year of my new life. I don't have any idea what my future holds or where this new year is going to take me, but I'm sure it will be quite the adventure. Life always is. And while the future is uncertain, I do know what I'm doing tonight: cooking something on the grill, drinking some beers, setting up my outdoor Xmas lights, listening to good music, watching the flames of the fire flicker and the moon disappear for a bit. I might even see some meteors from the Ursids meteor shower while I'm at it. I couldn't ask for a better start to a new year! Cheers!

Epiphany

I woke up this morning and discovered that the imaginary light bulb above my head had gone off during the night. The chaos and confusion was gone and suddenly it all made sense. This is a very good thing, but the timing sucked. Instead of being able to get a firm hold on my revelation, I had to get ready for work, drive to work and then, of course, start working. I know I can't reasonably expect an epiphany to only occur on a Saturday morning when I have nothing else to do, but come on "powers that be", can't you give a girl a break once and a while?

Now here it is lunch time, a mere 8 hours later, and I finally have time to write it down so I don't forget, but it's already too fuzzy. Sigh. Next time, maybe I should just be late for work.

Fail

I got to thinking about my current situation and decided that since I've basically had a mid-life crisis foisted upon me, that I might as well try to act like I'm having one. But I don't really want a red sports car. Well, I don't want the car payment part of it because that would take all the fun out of a bitching new Camaro. I could take a lover since apparently there's something about being married, but separated that is attractive to men. I've had quite a few offers, but it just hasn't appealed to me. When the right guy comes along, that may be a different story, but I have no desire to go out and look for him.

And although people say this is the perfect time to rediscover yourself or to find yourself, I was never lost. There are also no burning desires or dreams that I put on hold just because I was married. Sure, there are things I'd like to do or learn how to do, but those are more along the lines of deciding what to have for dinner. Learn German, jam out to Heavy Metal or read a book? Soup, salad or chicken-fried steak? Same sort of thing.

With one exception, the things I feel passionate about are still in my life . I guess you can't have a mid-life crisis unless it's the real thing and a plain old, run of the mill crisis just isn't the same. Shrug.

Bridges on Fire

Will they burn to the ground? I don't know. I haven't posted much here about the turmoil in my personal life, but it's been a matter of trying to stay on the best side of things as possible. I've given it my best shot and done all I can possibly do, but I've reached the point where I have to concede defeat. I'm worn out and tired of the struggle. The foot that's been trying to hold the door open on my marriage is battered, bruised and bloody from having the door slammed on it repeatedly and it needs a break. Time to let the door shut. It might open again later, but for now, time to rest and recuperate.

No voice, no work

Hah, I woke up this morning with laryngitis. I thought it was just a sore throat until I tried to tell my dog to chill out because he needed his morning walk before I was even out of bed. If I didn't have a dog to talk to, I probably wouldn't have even noticed that I had no voice until I got to work. So thank you, Theo, for having to go outside so badly this morning that you saved me a pointless 30 mile trip.

I don't feel sick, other than the sore throat, so it's pretty ironic that I ended up with a day off work on a day where I'd really rather be there earning some money. Most mornings, I'd like nothing more than to to go back to bed for some extra sleep, but not today as I got plenty of sleep last night and I'm wide awake. Oh well, I've been needing to do some serious housecleaning and it looks like this is the perfect opportunity. It may even get warm enough this afternoon to open up all the windows and air the place out. And if the internet connection holds, I might even catch up on that month's worth of email.

Still kicking

Haven't had internet access at home for a long time and there's been no chance to sneak in a post while at work. There was a time when not having internet access would have disturbed me greatly, but I find it only mildly annoying these days. I particularly miss being able to check the weather. I suppose I could hook up the TV to the free cable and watch the weather channel, but then I'd have to endure commercials and a lot of talking head jabber just to find out half of what I could get in seconds on the internet.

These days it's cold and dark when I get home from work and after I've tended to the dog and we've both had dinner, all I want to do is curl up under the covers with a good book. Even a bad book will do and I'm headed off to bed with one tonight that will, no doubt, have me asleep in minutes. I suppose instead I should take advantage of this sudden, unexpected wireless signal, but sleep is a more appealing notion at the moment than slogging through three to four weeks of unread email.