LATE EDITION...JUST CAUSE IT'S Special K ASKING

Wow...a late comer (no offense intended dude) with a question.
Special K asks:

Where do I get my hands on some of this "government cheese"? I hear about it all the time, but I don't think Canada has a cheese program. Throw me a bone here.

Or some cheese.

K.

Wow...I almost dropped my bong over this one. It's been so long since I've actually seen a big ol' log of gubmint cheese...go back to the early no...late 70's...no, early 80's when me and my buddy Dirk were working for a "non profit" center for "emotionally disturbed" kids...what a place that was, but I digress. Since it was "non profit" they were eligible for government food subsidies and part of that was giant blocks of "cheddar" cheese, about the size of a mailbox. There were so many of them that the kitchen manager would give them out to the employees she liked because the employees were so underpaid.(truth be told, they didn't really need the cheese, but it subsidized the ability to buy weed...and in my case skinks) Did I mention that skinks fucking rock the casbah? They do. Especially when you have a block of questionable cheddar the size of a mailbox in your house and this weeks paycheck screaming for you to buy that skink that caught your heart and soul when you went into the all night reptile emporium full of jager and meth.So you bought the skink and took the government cheese, and ate grilled cheese sammiches until you got paid again...grilled cheese sammiches,by the way, made from the government cheese, rocked. Beyond that, it's usefullness was limited, on account of the high oil and insect parts ratio that was common with government cheese products...after all, it was manufactured for the poor. But, with a good buzz and some generic chips, the government grilled cheese rocked.Alas, you can't get the cheese anymore...but it lives on-as a metaphor for any government funded program in the U.S.- a less than adequate hand out to people in need. A historical footnote: The official who sponsored the "let's appease the poor of america with mailbox sized chunks of "cheddar" cheese" was eaten alive by rats who infested the cheese vault in baltimore to provide "filler". And the rest is history...Hey! Quit bogarting that joint! Pass it now or this skink on my head will bite your ass!!!He totally rocks, by the way. History makes my brain hurt....:)

[Listening to: Amphetamines And Coffee - The Afghan Whigs - Up In It (1:54)]